I’m the Director! Now. Shut up and do as you are told!

Ok. I know I shouldn’t say this, but some of these actors are going to make me lose it! This actress (I won’t name names) said she has creative differences with me about MY FILM! I told her to do as she is told or she will be looking for a new job! You see…I am THE DIRECTOR. It’s my vision. It’s my artistic integrity that is on the line. You are just the actress who will read the lines as she is instructed to do. Sorry. I just had to vent. These actors are going to cause me to get my first wrinkle!

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Please Do NOT Buy This Book!

Book

A true fan would never buy this book. I’m sure my brother will use the money to purchase drugs. If you buy it, you’ll be hurting me and my family at the same time. Whatever you do, please do NOT buy this book!

Shhh…Don’t Tell Guy I’m Blogging

Gwyneth’s husband Chris was bragging that his new album is selling better than “Hard Candy.” I explained to him that his profits must be split between all the members of Coldplay. In order to compete with me he must go solo and appear in his next video wearing a leotard! He’s so nerdy sometimes I can’t take it! His cd is selling well though. Maybe I’ll write a song about the color Yellow and shooting apples off my head! NOT!

I hope you are having a wonderful day! Guy is coming. Shhh. Don’t tell him I’m blogging again about bits and bobs!

Rumours About My Life

Hi everyone. Thanks for all of your support. I have been too busy to blog lately with all the tour preparations and videos and parenting and the list goes on and on and on! I’m just so busy. However, there is something I have to get off my chest. My marriage is going great. I would never adopt a child and then file for divorce! That’s just not me. Please spread the word. I’m also not having an affair with a baseball player. How silly can you be?

Cheek Implants…NOT!

I have been informed that there is a rumour that I have had cheek implants. Nothing could be further from the truth. My makeup artist got carried away the night of the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony and now everyone thinks my cheeks are different. They are not! If you see me without my makeup, I look just like I did 20 years ago. I chalk it up to my fitness regime and healthy lifestyle. If you want to look good, get up out of your seat. Come on up to the dance floor! No seriously…Step away from your computer and head to the gym. Kick some arse for mama!

Update: Express yourself don’t repress yourself! I have told my assistant to allow all comments to be published. Nothing is off limits. I want free discussion on my blog. I have never compromised my artistic integrity and I want my fans to have the same freedom. With this freedom comes responsibility. Please be nice and don’t abuse your power.

Blog Neglect

I am so sorry that I have been too busy to blog. A girl has to work ya know. My family depends on me for their food and shelter. It’s not like the ol’ man is bringing home the bacon. Just kidding, Guy! LOL. My new album is in the process of being manufactured right this minute. I asked for security to guard the facilities. I also asked them to videotape people as they work and they are to be inspected before leaving. If this new album leaks, it will not be because I didn’t try!

I am so exhausted. It’s hard working and being a mama! There I go again quoting Britney’s Blackout album. I have been loving that one. I workout to it all the time!

I want to personally thank all of you for purchasing the new single “4 Minutes.” You can purchase all of the remixes tomorrow on various online shops. Please buy all of them. Make mama number one!

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