The Queen’s Freebies Jeebies: M Toilet Paper!

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People are always talking about celebrities receiving free designer clothing and other expensive gifts from various companies. The companies give it to people like me because it’s free advertising for their products if people like me are seen with them.

I have received many items that shocked the living hell out of me, however. Like this gift from Quilted Northern. They had rolls of tissue made with my initial “M” and a little crown above it. It’s very pretty. They sent me 50 rolls and included a letter which said “To Madonna – here’s a year supply of toilet paper that was made just for the Queen of Pop. Compliments of Quilted Northern.” I guess they read some of the blog posts I made talking about pooping and decided to send me this gift because I needed it. lol. It’s funny because I would expect they would send more than 50 rolls. I surely use more than that in a year!

Here’s their list of the Top 10 Bathroom Songs (from their website):

People are always talking about celebrities receiving free designer clothing and other expensive gifts from various companies. The companies give it to people like me because it’s free advertising for their products if people like me are seen with them.I have received many items that shocked the living hell out of me, however. Like this gift from Quilted Northern. They had rolls of tissue made with my initial “M” and a little crown above it. It’s very pretty. They sent me 50 rolls and included a letter which said “To Madonna – here’s a year supply of toilet paper that was made just for the Queen of Pop. Compliments of Quilted Northern.” I guess they read some of the blog posts I made talking about pooping and decided to send me this gift because I needed it. lol. It’s funny because I would expect they would send more than 50 rolls. I surely use more than that in a year!

Here’s their list of the Top 10 Bathroom Songs (from their website)

10. “Flushed From the Bathroom of Your Heart” (Johnny Cash, 1968) Hearts don’t have bathrooms, but have a heart and be sure to flush when you’re in the bathroom.
9. “I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair” (“South Pacific” soundtrack, Rogers & Hammerstein, 1949) Although there’s no scientific proof that men can be washed out of anyone’s hair, shampoo can rid your hair of dirt, grime and even dandruff. See a beauty stylist to determine how to rid your hair of larger items.
8. “Meeting in the Ladies’ Room” (Klymaxx, 1984) This smash hit spoke to the popular trend of women traveling in groups to use the facilities. Why do women travel in packs to the ladies’ room? Men may never know.
7. “Shower Me with Your Love” (Surface, 1989) This song peaked at No. 5 on Billboard’s hot 100 in 1989. Unfortunately, the band Surface wasn’t showered with any more hits, making this a bathroom one-hit wonder.
6. “Tubthumping” (Chumbawamba, 1997) Americans say they would spend between $2,500 and $7,500 to remodel and decorate their bathrooms. The most common change? Adding a large whirlpool tub.
5. “Wipeout” (Surfaris, 1963) More than 20 million accidents do happen in the home. If you “wipeout” in the tub or on the bathroom floor, try the new softest ever Quilted Northern to help pad the injured area.
4. “Shower the People” (James Taylor, 1976) While this song talks about showering love, when it comes to staying clean, 53 percent of Americans prefer a hot shower to a bath.
3. “Splish Splash” (Bobby Darin, 1958) In this popular song, Darin sings about “relaxing in the tub” on a Saturday night. Many people favor this form of stress reduction – rubber ducks are optional.
2. “Smokin’ in the Boy’s Room” (Brownsville Station, 1974) Although smoking isn’t allowed in school, many students don’t “want to be filled up with those rules,” according to Brownsville Station. Another popular rule is to wash your hands before leaving the bathroom.
1. “She Came in Through the Bathroom Window” (Joe Cocker and the Beatles, 1969) Contrary to the action in this popular song, bathroom windows are not the common entry-way for criminals. Most use the front, back, or garage doors.

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2 Responses

  1. I want M toilet paper. No…I want C toilet paper.

  2. how about ”Valentino”condoms….!?!tell me where did you get those from darling!You!I can’t wait to start my life with you!!!

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