This may sound corny, but I don’t care. I don’t know what I’d do without my friend Gwyneth. She has been there for me through all of this latest scandal surrounding me. I was so happy to see her in New York. She’s been helping me in so many ways. We were just just joking around yesterday singing, “Keep smiling, keep shining…knowing you can always count on me…for sure…that’s what friends are for!” I am so frustrated with all of the lies and rumours about my life. My attorneys have sent a warning letter to Mrs. Rodriguez’s attorneys. One more comment about me and their firm will be facing a defamation lawsuit. I don’t play around! I hope you are having a better week than I am having. Oh…I almost forgot. I have been working with Britney on a special project. She has made so much progress. I cannot wait for you to see it! It’s da bomb!

This is amazing. Look at this up close and then walk away from the computer about 15 feet and look again. It’s all an illusion. There’s too much confusion!

A true fan would never buy this book. I’m sure my brother will use the money to purchase drugs. If you buy it, you’ll be hurting me and my family at the same time. Whatever you do, please do NOT buy this book!

I have to admit that performing “Give it to Me” is a nightmare. The lyrics are “don’t need to catch my breath!” However, each time I get to that part I am gasping for air! The choreography is so intense that I am completely out of breath like Amy Winehouse leaving a crack house! Last month one of the new dancers laughed and said, “M, you’re out of breath! Ha ha ha!” I told him that I had several dancers who would love to replace him. He hasn’t made any rude comments since then!

I’d like to remind you all once again that my marriage is going great and I am not having an affair with anyone. Please take note of this. Have a great week!

I am so exhausted. I have been rehearsing over and over. I know I’m still youthful looking, but I am starting to feel the effects of time on my body. If I have to sing “Borderline” one more time! I know you guys love that song and would like to hear it in the tour, but it drives me bonkers. Maybe I’ll keep it; however, I will be the one who decides. You can count on that. It won’t be you. LOL. I was singing “Spanish Lesson” on Tuesday and I thought, “Why the hell am I singing this? Yuck!” I immediately pulled that song from the set list. I’m just not feeling it right now. At least I have it rehearsed in case we need to add something later, but I cannot imagine singing that over and over! Arrrgh!

I was so sweaty during rehearsal the other day that one of the dancers said I should call the tour “The Sticky and Sweat Tour.” I was like “Ok….NOT!” Could you see the awful sponsors like “Arrid Extra Dry.” I can’t take anymore. Have a great 4th, you guys!

Gwyneth’s husband Chris was bragging that his new album is selling better than “Hard Candy.” I explained to him that his profits must be split between all the members of Coldplay. In order to compete with me he must go solo and appear in his next video wearing a leotard! He’s so nerdy sometimes I can’t take it! His cd is selling well though. Maybe I’ll write a song about the color Yellow and shooting apples off my head! NOT!

I hope you are having a wonderful day! Guy is coming. Shhh. Don’t tell him I’m blogging again about bits and bobs!

Hi everyone. Thanks for all of your support. I have been too busy to blog lately with all the tour preparations and videos and parenting and the list goes on and on and on! I’m just so busy. However, there is something I have to get off my chest. My marriage is going great. I would never adopt a child and then file for divorce! That’s just not me. Please spread the word. I’m also not having an affair with a baseball player. How silly can you be?

I have been informed that there is a rumour that I have had cheek implants. Nothing could be further from the truth. My makeup artist got carried away the night of the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony and now everyone thinks my cheeks are different. They are not! If you see me without my makeup, I look just like I did 20 years ago. I chalk it up to my fitness regime and healthy lifestyle. If you want to look good, get up out of your seat. Come on up to the dance floor! No seriously…Step away from your computer and head to the gym. Kick some arse for mama!

Update: Express yourself don’t repress yourself! I have told my assistant to allow all comments to be published. Nothing is off limits. I want free discussion on my blog. I have never compromised my artistic integrity and I want my fans to have the same freedom. With this freedom comes responsibility. Please be nice and don’t abuse your power.